“You are running behind and listen to me Alison, this isn’t your first time and so I don’t need to hear another excuse from your side. Finish the script as soon as you can and mail it to me, after all you have reached the ending and I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t take much time to finish the rest of it” Jake spoke through the phone with his usual self confidence, contemplating whether he needs to change his script writer for the 100th time that week. Alison, though a flawless writer, took so much time to finish and has put him into many awkward situations with various sponsors but never was he sorry for it because her writings were always on the top with the best-selling records set high each year.
People had always commented on his strange affection with Ms. Alison but he had always brushed it off like it was easy, always fooling himself more than anyone else. He had met Alison for the first time when he changed schools in 11th grade. She was the most beautiful girl in their class and to top that she asked him on a date too, saying,she was impressed with the way he spoke English. Jake smiles to himself thinking of a sweet but simple memory.
Alison wasn’t simple and nothing with her was too, she wasn’t a solution for an answer instead she was the question, just like those never-ending questions asked by a little kid. She was sometimes silent and unchanging like a calm sea and only spoke through writings but other times she was bubbly and squeaky, with a great talent for making people laugh, no matter which situation they are in.
Two more days into waiting, he saw Alison walk down the road with an envelope in her hand and he felt a strange feeling at the bottom of his stomach. He hadn’t felt this way since they had broken up, a year before. Maybe it’s because it’s the first time he is seeing her after the break up, he thought to himself. He walked down and asked her to have coffee with him to which she was hesitant to say yes, but agreed with his persistent persuasion.
“How are you Aly” Jake asked her as soon as they sat down after ordering their regulars. Jake noticed her wearing the beige top he had gifted her on her 21st birthday, she paired it up with a white loose pants and her hair in a tight ponytail. She looked professional, not wanting to make a false impression on him for her sudden visit after a year of their break up. She looked up with pain in her face, as if Jake already knew the answer to the question.
“Why bother asking when you know the answer Jake?” She answered me with a question, nothing was simple and I guess it never will be.
“It's been a year Aly; can you not forgive me?”
“Please stop calling me that”
“Can you or not forgive me?” I spoke with my sound louder each time
“Bye” She said and walked out before I could speak. She had kept the envelope on the table. I opened it and saw a letter addressed to me.
(TW/Abuse)
Dear Jake
I am not sure if I can ever call you ‘dear’ anymore Jake. I know this is the cliché me writing to you every time instead of saying it to your face. I find comfort in writing; it helps me release my pain which I have held on for so long. Sometimes in life you meet people and then you feel this strange connection with them, the kind of ones you see in movies or read in books about. That was how I felt when we got together. You never failed to show me your love yet you became the very thing that I was afraid of in my entire life.
You were everything I wanted and my whole world was you and the fact that all of my books were about you would be no surprise to you but I am not able to write an ending for my last book. Yes, I am not going to be writing anymore because my world has come to an end. What I have treasured the most in my heart became the very thing I hated about my existence.
There was no difference in the way you treated me even after knowing my abusive father and the childhood he ruined for me and the innocence I lost. I saw my father in you the first time you slapped me, I thought it was going to stop but it never did. All I could see when I looked at you was my father. Love then became the cruelest thing someone can give to another. You changed what love meant to me. I never had the courage to say this to you because I was afraid and I still am but I know that I won’t be seeing you ever again in my life. So here is my confession letter from the 23-year-old me who lost her way, found herself among the wolves and the bad men and could never find her way back.
Perhaps the world then ended for me that day.
No more love
Alison
Written by Aleena T Sabu
BA (Hons) Political Science, Shaheed Bhagat Singh College, Delhi University
Aleena T Sabu won the first position under the UG category of the short story writing competition, 'Prose It!', whose theme had been decided to be "perhaps the world ends here", the competition was held under November's Literary Fest named 'Breathe'
Comments